In the Doctors Surgery
Names that were called out
On the tannoy would ensure
That laughter could sprout:
Patients, even feeling glum
Grim, sad, in deep pain
Felt a brief cure coming on
As down they did rain!
The first, Mrs Midia
Her first name was: Claire!
Soon came a chap: Mr Ayke,
A chap with singed hair
Edward Ayke the tannoy grinned
Ed Ayke! What a name!
And it wasn't very long
For more laughs the same:
Mr Scratch was next called in
Mr Ivor Scratch!
He was itching quite a lot
(Hope it didn't catch!)
Master Bates a spotty brat
Was next, then Miss Pann;
Miss Louise Pan, Lou for short,
With a most flushed tan!
Mrs Phant was soon called out
Mrs Ellie Phant!
Strangely she had heavy feet,
Next, a stroppy rant:
Mr Yelling, face red raw
Shouted: "I've been here
Waiting for an hour now!
Warm has turned my beer!"
A strange bloke called Allan Key
(He has a screw loose)
Followed, then a Mr Hang
Carrying a noose!
A posh woman, wearing chains
(Worse than Mr T)
Entered and said "How d'ya do?
My name is Holl-eeeee!
"Holly Wood, I am a star
Red carpet should be
Rolled out, these high heels I wear
Cost a bomb! Look! See!"
I just sat there with "the piss"
Running down my leg;
I heard a chap, Mr Pong
Cry out for a peg...